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Officers and Sergeants


Posted by
Buckramega
Jun 17, 2008
Category: Humor
Currently rated
Moderately Awesome
by 21 users

For those of you unfamiliar with the military, Officers are the ones ultimately in charge of the military - the General, Colonels, Majors, and Lieutenants. Sergeants are often considered the backbone of the military - they do all of the "real" work. I am a Staff Sergeant in the Air Force, so I found the following to be rather humorous. I got it in an email some time ago and I do not remember who sent it to me.

Officers and Sergeants

officer sergeant


3 Real Life Stories

The first...

Eleven people were dangling below a helicopter on a rope. There were ten Officers and one Sergeant. Since the rope was not strong enough to hold all the eleven, they decided that one of them had to let go to save all the others.

They could not decide who should be the volunteer. Finally the Sergeant said he would let go of the rope since Sergeants are used to doing everything for the good of the Service. They forsake their family, don’t claim all of their expenses and do a lot of overtime without getting anything in return.

When he finished his moving speech all the Officers began to clap...

Moral:
Never underestimate the powers of a Sergeant.

The second...

A group of Sergeants and a group of Officers take a train to a conference. Each Officer holds a ticket. But the entire group of Sergeants has bought only one ticket for a single passenger. The Officers are just shaking their heads and are secretly pleased that the arrogant Sergeants will finally get what they deserve.

Suddenly one of the Sergeants calls out: "The conductor is coming!". At once, all the Sergeants jump up and squeeze into one of the toilets. The conductor checks the tickets of the Officers. When he notices that the toilet is occupied he knocks on the door and says: "Ticket, please!" One of the Sergeants slides the single ticket under the doors and the conductor continues merrily on his round.

For the return trip the Officers decide to use the same trick. They buy only one ticket for the entire group but they are baffled as they realize that the Sergeants didn’t buy any tickets at all. After a while one of the Sergeants announces again: "The conductor is coming!" Immediately all the Officers race to a toilet and lock themselves in.

All the Sergeants leisurely walk to the other toilet. Before the last Sergeant enters the toilet, he knocks on the toilet occupied by the Officers and says: "Ticket, please!"

And the moral of the story? Officers like to use the methods of the Sergeants, but they don't really understand them.

The third...

Once upon a time three Officers were walking through the woods and suddenly they were standing in front of a huge, wild river. But they desperately had to get to the other side. But how, with such a raging torrent? The first Officer knelt down and prayed to the Lord: "Lord, please give me the strength to cross this river!"

*pppppfffffffuuuuffffffff*
The Lord gave him long arms and strong legs. Now he could swim across the river. It took him about two hours and he almost drowned several times. BUT: he was successful! The second Officer, who observed this, prayed to the Lord and said: "Lord, please give me the strength AND the necessary tools to cross this river!"

*pppppfffffffuuuuffffffff*
The Lord gave him a tub and he managed to cross the river despite the fact that the tub almost capsized a couple of times. The third Officer who observed all this knelt down and prayed: "Lord, please give me the strength, the means and the intelligence to cross this river!"

*pppppfffffffuuuuffffffff*
The Lord converted the Officer into a Sergeant. The Sergeant took a quick glance on the map, walked a few meters upstream and crossed the bridge.
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User Comments

hahaha

Comment by: Rawr -- Date: 2008-08-25 19:49:09

Nice

Comment by: Tombroski -- Date: 2008-07-28 21:40:41

I'm so glad I was enlisted.

Comment by: makeyourtime -- Date: 2008-07-27 21:41:20

Military jokes ftw

Comment by: SamuraiPizzaCat -- Date: 2008-07-21 19:13:04

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